the waters surface

Captivated by ripples in the water
Softly wind is molding my skin
Dancing trees share their bearing
With every breathing kin

Swirls in the water
Enchanted by the wind
Make me dizzy dizzy, like running along giant fingerprints
My head is singing along with orchestral leafy canopys
Pebbels hugging the earth the earth yea the earth beneath my feet

If I slip now I might shatter
Spread out falling back, in and on to the ground

[I hope you still call it teenage angst when you’re 25
So I can feel young, naive and contrived]
Crawling back into the womb I found myself and everyone else
The man I want to be but I’d rather not
‚cause I might trip neck deep into knot (knot after knot?)

It’s the waters surface calling me in
You’re late boy
We’re sinking to the lowest low
You’ll feel quiet at home

The shame is creeping up
Piercing like hot needles through my brain
Sterilizing bit by bit as fish is caught by the crane

the deconstructionist

Day by day I’m losing sight
Awaiting the moment I’ll be blind
The fears that made me human
Only fractured senses craving inbound
Sparks in a desintegrating arc

In these tiny rooms I caved in
The space inside me
A Kafka-esque villian
With steps that soar
And doors that pore
Into cipher

Day by day I’m losing sight
Awaiting the moment I’ll be blind
The fears that made me human
Only fractured senses craving inbound
Sparks in a desintegrating arc

Ties are loosening
Fingerprints, my only offspring
No feelings left behind
Words couldn’t express what was on my mind

Vanish
Vanish
Vanish
Vanish

From conscience to conscience
We swept upon eachother
Beyond boundaries of possibillites
Creating history

As we sought you out
All we’ve found was sand in our hands
And infinity above our deathbeds
Piercing the endless darkness with Apollos arrowheads

For the longest time tracing back the snow into the clouds
Where war is waiting to be found
Tell me I’ve learned
I do better
I’ve learned
I do better
But hunger is stronger
And the dread of comfort wants to conquer
A self-serving monger

Ideals are dead
Fetish will flourish
Until next time we pick up our heads
Out of the current
Now we’ve learned
We’ll do better
We’ve learned
We’ll do better
Whatever is better
Whatever is better

They did not abandon us
We got rid of them
Let the age of humans begin

serpenthood

If I can’t be your servant
We’ll forever be chasing serpents

Unintelligable, I rather loathe six feet under
Going down your throat, living in your bowel
Then have my skull cracked asunder
Have your skin as a towel
For my tears to be the rain to your thunder

If I can’t be your servant
We’ll forever be chasing serpents

I know how it all came to be
A self fulfilling prophecy
When we first met I told you
„There will be a hug that breaks our necks“
Good riddance, the ticking distance
Is all it came to be

If I can’t be your servant
I’ll rather be inadvertant
The most zealous of serpents
The most zealous of serpents

the comedown

I wish your mother breastfed you malice
Instead of dignity
So you wouldn’t be as healthy
When our 4heads meet
So I could drop my last bit of chaos
On your soda sweet teeth

Your perfect circles
Have an apple shaped sign
Maybe I throw your name up
When my depression declines
I want your body to be as sick as mine

If I was your dad
I would’ve made goddamn sure you become brat
With a classic beat called „Trouser Belt Dropdead“
So when you hear this sound
You’ll be remembered of your lowliness

Your perfect circles
Have an apple shaped sign
Maybe I throw your name up
When my depression declines
I want your body to be as sick as mine

Sometimes I wished you would catch my cold
But without the snot, without the choke
If you want to be Jesus I’ll lovingly be your Jude

21.06.356 v. chr.

Es brennt ein Scheiterhaufen in meinem Kopf,

ich speie Flammen, bin Pyromane, bin Nero, bin Herostratos

Schmerzen mit kleinen Stichen teilen, wann werde ich ihn los?

Diesen Benzin gefüllten schwarzen Tropf?

Ich bin satt, nicht mehr durstig.

Ich bin satt, nicht mehr durstig.

Bringe das Gefühl von Banalität nicht hinter mich, wenn man es ausspricht.

Distanzen so groß, Hände halten, gleich Briefe schreiben.

Blicke tauschen, gleich Denkmal meißeln.

Verzehre mich, zereiße mich, verbrauche mich.

Alles. Nur kein Licht auf Schatten schmeißen.

Kein Wort das Wahr wäre, nur wage.

Zerbrich meine glässernen Lippen, bevor ich etwas sage.

Dann könnte ich vielleicht endlich Zähne zeigen.

Klammergriff

Es ist vielleicht der Weg, es sind vielleicht die Menschen, vielleicht auch einfach die Stadt selbst. Man presst sich sich an Ampel Lichtern und unästhetischen Betonwenden vorbei, obwohl genug Platz vorhanden ist. Und wenn es die Möglichkeit gibt eine Unterführung zu nehmen, gehen die meisten Menschen dem Gestank und der schlechten Beleuchtung lieber aus dem Weg. Ich aber nicht. Ich nehme es in Kauf. Genauso wie die speienden Flammen der Hausfassaden die sich vor meinem inneren Auge abspielen. Ich frage mich dann manchmal ob jemand anderes gerade vielleicht genau das selbe sieht. Genug Zeit zum nachdenken habe ich. Auch wenn ich fünzehn Minuten früher an meinem Arbeitsplatz bin. Direkt spricht mich ein Kunde an, osteuropäischer Herkunft, verfaultes und ungepflegtes Gebiss, unkenntliche Tattoowierungen am Hals. Er hat einen Jungen und eine Frau im Schlepptau. Vermutlich seine Familie. Gebrochene Wörter wollen mir vermitteln an was genau er interessiert ist, was mich aber in keinster weiße interessiert. Er kann es nicht Ausdrücken, möchte das ich ihm Folge, er will es mir zeigen. Abschaum. Das bisschen Geld was er besitzt wirft er für Luxusgüter aus dem Fenster. Wir stehen vor einem leeren Karton, Werbung. Er ist überrascht als ich ihm erkläre das dies nur ein Werbeplatzhalter ist. Prompt wird sich in nicht verständlicher Sprache ausgetauscht. Worüber? Ich habe keinen blassen Schimmer. Ich will es auch nicht wissen. Ich drehe ihm einfach mit die teuerste Version an, von dem was er gerne möchte. Ist das unfreundlich? Moralich verwerflich? Natürlich könnte man argumentieren er hat ja die Entscheidungsfreiheit. Aber Tatsache ist ich habe versucht ihn zu manipulieren und es geschafft mehr Geld aus ihm raus zu hauen. Weil es mir egal ist welchen Schrott sich die Leute kaufen, um sich ihren Lebenscountdown auf diesem Planeten zu versüßen. Hauptsache ich habe einen Job und hungere nicht.

everything is violence

For the sake of beeing destined to devour
Violence speak our nails and teeth, swelling what sleeps beneath
We’re the seconds becoming hours, the years that slowly crumble and cower
Searching for a need, that is more than me
The trauma of birth, mere a discrepancy
Please don’t let me leave
I’m not made for this hardship
A snowman preyieng to his sun supreme

Breed, breed, breed
And feed
The alien in your womb
The brainsucking leech
Don’t stop untill the Über-ich is pleased
Don’t stop untill the Über-ich is pleased

Most comfortably we are diggin holes
In unclear skin
And unconsciously we are choking necks
That are supposed to carry a head
Yes hold my hand but a little tighter now
Just a little tighter now
I won’t forget when I’m hurt
In this dire times you need to be the snake, not the bird
Please make it hurt

Breed, breed, breed
And feed
The alien in your womb
The brainsucking leech
Don’t stop untill the Über-ich is pleased
Don’t stop untill the Über-ich is pleased

Kvíði

I’m about to lose it
If another shit face is telling me about the preservation of western virtues,
because the truth is you are just afraid
Afraid of the unknown, afraid of losing what you exploited of craving back bones

We’ll let you die
We never really meant much to you
We’ll let you die
Otherwise you would’ve thought this through
We’ll let you die
That a refugee want’s the same rights like you, motherfucker

Dirty work isn’t done by a nation of poets and clerks
These aren’t our wars, these aren’t our problems
We whitewash our reputation in rifles and tank shell ammunition
Young turks are no longer the cancer to these politics, but mere an uninspired swarm  called anonymous

We’ll let you die
We never really meant much to you
We’ll let you die
Otherwise you would’ve thought this through
We’ll let you die
That a refugee want’s the same rights like you, motherfucker

You’re welcome as long as you’re helpfull
A generation of wallets immune to denazification
Scandalizing anything that isn’t worth mentioning
And you still have the guts to equalize us

They won’t have our pumpguns

We’re the dreaming kids
Of mutual bites and bits
Our purgatory is the urban fringe
Where our conscience can’t be singed
Only our minds stay in clinch with our sins

Where to go?
If home is a whole?
What to do?
If you can’t pursue?
The world is what passed me through and through

Take note
This bullshit ain’t makes you a better person
It just prevents you from becoming a lich
Under the hands of Sokrates, every thought seems out of place

We’re lost in paradise
Evenfall has tricked our senses
We’re lost in paradise
For breakfast we eat our cancers, relentless
We’re lost in paradise

I’ve lost touch with reality
And the truth is I don’t believe in morality
Nothing is true, everything is allowed
I exist to doubt

Born in sin
I gave up diggin for wonders under this tender Skin
Everything is nothing, but nothing isn’t everything

God only left a tired grin

Sweet Jesus

For whom I live you ask?
I wish I could, I wish I would be the vast
For whom I live you ask?
I wish I could, I wish you wouldn’t ask
For whom I live you ask?
I’m not a servant, I’m the task

I’m not alive, I’m just patroling the sideline

I see us beeing brothers in another time
Maybe when our condition will sublime
We become a tapestry of undone crimes